Overcoming Obstacles

How To: Love People You Really Don’t Like



This will not be a super popular post for the millennial generation. Maybe I’m wrong…

I say this only because as I was writing the title feeling of angst and hesitancy crept up on me. I feel entitled to not have to do anything I would rather not do… this seems to be an unhealthy trend in my life and in our generation.

Anyhow, back on point! That’s another can of worms for another fishing trip.

Why would we want to love the people we don’t like? That seems backwoods and backwards…it’s plain weird. Even though loving these people definitely falls beneath all three categories I think I’m fairly safe to make the claim that we all, somewhere deep within ourselves, know we want to be able to not only like but also love these obstinate, whinny, annoying people.

Because that’s what the Bible tells us to do right? Right.

We read that message in the Word, soak it in. Dwell on it. After our thought provoking meditation we say we love them with our hearts; however, this is not the truth at all. With our minds we despise their very existence.

Nope, just me? Well, this is awkward…

Okay, I write for myself then because I need to hear it.

God has been teaching me some things about loving those people and the implications of not doing so. To Him this stuff is serious business!

Serious busssiness.

“If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.” 1 John 4:20


Let’s learn to love.

Learning to Love: 3 Tips

I have provided some tips I’ve been learning as I stumble along the pathway to maturing as an adult.

  1. Pray For The Person-even when (especially when) you’re frustrated and angry with their behaviour ask God to know what you should pray. Pray that you see them the way God does. Ultimately this will soften your heart towards them and help you see them in a different light. It works!
  2. Do Make Boundaries-know your limits around that person and set them accordingly. If you can only spend a few hours with them before going batty then that is your boundary. Explain the boundary to the person gently (writing letters is the method I will use).
  3. Seek For Opportunities-ask God for and look for ways to bless the person. Bake cookies for them…wipe the snow off their car et cetera. Show them they are loved

Ultimately, experiencing a little discomfort at first is key to showing people they are loved.

If you’re a little hesitant ask yourself this: what is more important? My comfort or this person knowing they are loved?

This year I ask God to help me choose the latter more often than not. 



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